Somehow through my obsessive wanderings on Pinterest, I have possibly (completely unintentionally) found something to help me. Usually, these get pinned to a private board called, ‘Getting My Shit Together’, which I have yet to read, but for some reason, I was a bit more proactive today. Possibly out of guilt for actually watching Bachelor in Paradise (WHAT is wrong with me??) or just because I streamlined my Pinterest boards this weekend (completely avoiding said ‘Getting My Shit Together’ board, obviously) and am trying not to pin things that I don’t ever look at or use, as Pinterest is, in general, simultaneously the best and worst app that has ever happened to me.
So, what was this amazing post that actually got me reading before pinning? Well, I don’t know. I didn’t pin it in the end. But it led me to The Abundant Mama Rise & Shine Challenge. And I’m doing it. Me: the no-energy, morning-hating, can’t-actualize-anything Negative Nancy (which is not actually my name).
First step? Answer the following questions:
1. What do you want your ideal mornings to feel like?
2. How do you want them to flow?
3. What sounds do you want to hear?
I find the questions themselves quite interesting, especially in the word usage. I don’t believe it’s accidental that the author uses “feel”, “flow” and “hear” in three separate questions, which perhaps are simply the same question, phrased differently for different learner types. I find myself resonating with the first question, and am quite surprised (and intrigued) by the third. I would never in a million years imagine the sounds I want to hear for an ideal anything. That said, I think it’s valid and interesting. Regardless, I shall do my best to answer all three.
1. I want them to feel easy. I don’t want there to be any strain or any rush towards that dreaded moment when the boy wakes up or when “real life” has to start. I want it to be natural and I want to feel ready for the day. Most importantly, I want to feel like I am choosing to wake up, not as if I am being forced. That feeling carries throughout the day, leaving me feeling as if I am forced into this difficult life that exhausts me. In actuality, I love my life and am very blessed to be living it. Beyond that, I chose this life, and I think it’s time I remembered that. There have been a few scattered mornings throughout my life where I found myself actually singing, “Rise and shine and give God that glory, glory!” I would like to feel that again.
In terms of specifics, I would like to feel like I’ve accomplished. I would like to get the simple things: unloading the dishwasher, starting a load of laundry, tidying anything leftover from the night before, thinking about the shape of the day, done quickly and easily so that I also have time to sit in front of the computer and perhaps begin to write, or at the very least blog. I would like to exercise and do yoga. I would like to meditate and find a way to reconnect with the peace and joy that has been lacking from my life for too long.
Those are a lot of things and as I don’t think I’ll be waking up at 3:00 AM, I’m not entirely sure I’ll be able to accomplish them all. However, I believe that getting into a routine will leave me more likely to have a routine at naptime and in the evenings that allow me that time as well. I also don’t have to do the same exact things every single morning. Perhaps I could alternate between writing/blogging and exercise to start out and my meditation could be very quick, with no expectations to start out.
2. I would like it to flow naturally and feel like I’m choosing each step. I’ve known for some time now that I do well on routines, yet haven’t had the will power or determination to enforce one, so I’d love for this to work. I’d like it to get better each day, easier each day and I’d like the feeling of accomplishment and intention to flow into the rest of my day as well – as in, I’d like to stop watching crap like Bachelor in Paradise because I’m so exhausted, that’s all I can manage. That can’t be true. I won’t allow that to be true and I very much don’t want to show that as a truth to my children. I already struggle in the afternoons with my little boy and I don’t want to continue to feel guilty (which just leaves me more paralyzed to take action) nor do I want it to be something I inadvertently pass on to him or my daughter.
3. Being a non-oratory learner, I don’t often think about sounds. In fact, unless they are background noises, they often distract from my purpose, rather than enhance it. However, I think I can control that more than I’ve ever thought to (which is not at all). My first reaction to this question is birds. I’d like to hear birds. Whenever I have got up and out of the house early, I’ve felt glorious walking down the street, listening to the chatter of the birds. The other sound I love, which is good considering where I live, is the rain. I love to open the windows, potter around the house and listen to the raindrops on the patio, roof and all around. So, those sounds would be good.
Those sounds, however, are out of my control, to a certain degree (bar opening the window, as, like I said, living in Germany, you’re pretty much guaranteed rain at some point…). But this question got me thinking of other sounds. I’ve always been a bit envious of my husband’s love for podcasts and iTunes University and the like. I want to learn things, too! So, perhaps, these are other sounds I’d like to hear – both of the intellectual and of the inspirational variety. Beyond that, I can’t really write or do work to music, but I would like to listen to music I don’t often listen to, such as Krishna Das or other things that really make me feel positive and connected.
So, there you have it. My first step. I guess that was pretty easy for a first step. I didn’t even have to wake up early (yet!).