30 Day Shred – BEFORE & Day One

Please be warned, this is going to be embarrassing. Mostly for me.

I was watching The Biggest Loser the other day (and no, that’s not even the embarrassing part.) and at some point, Jillian Michaels said that before you really commit yourself, before you find how you’re going to get in shape, you need a why. At first, this made me feel guilty, because obviously this meant that not only am I not important enough, but my darling husband and my sweet little boy are not important enough either. For a few days, I was feeling quite bad about it. Then I realized that I needed to get over that because in fact, those two crazy boys ARE important enough and so is the next baby (a girl?) that we want to have this next year – especially if it’s a girl.

Did I mention I want a girl?

Anyway, I was watching The Biggest Loser again (still not the embarrassing part…) and on this episode, the woman that was voted off said that she always hid her body, even from her husband, and that putting on the shirt that had her weight on it was a turning point. She felt she was allowed to own it.

So, this is me owning it. And yes, now we’ve got to the embarrassing part. The before pictures. And stats. And because I was inspired by The Biggest Loser (I’ve never been happier that this is an anonymous blog.), I decided to buy Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred. Day One was today. It was exciting, difficult and annoying because about five minutes before it was done, the little monster (who is sick; it’s not his fault.), woke up early from his nap. Then, because he’s sick, he pretty much clung to me, crying, as I tried to finish.

Hopefully Day Two will be a bit more successful.


ARMS – 12 1/2 inches

THIGHS – 25 1/2 inches

TRUE WAIST – 36 inches

BELLY BUTTON – 39 inches

HIPS – 42 inches

WEIGHT – 166.8 lbs

GOAL WEIGHT – 130 lbs

(but would be happy with – 135 lbs)

*Edited to add weight & goal weight*


Note to Self


These ideas have all been expressed before, in list form even. Probably even all together in the same list. But suddenly, today, standing in the bathroom just before bed, they seemed to come to me in language I understood. I need to repeat them. Once or twice. Daily.

1. Don’t allow yourself to be such a perfectionist that you forget to allow yourself to be good at and dedicated to the things you choose to be.

2. Do not allow yourself to be so guilty that you truly don’t see the difference between certain oft-judged behaviors that you truly enjoy and ones that are truly harmful.

3. Do not allow yourself to be so replete with thee, that you forget to be truly you (Or, you know, whatever that poem by Sir Thomas Browne says…).

4. Do not give your thoughts so much credence. You needn’t perceive every negative thought as a failure to be grateful.

5. Do not devalue your contribution to the world, no matter how small.

6. Do not feel that you need to numb yourself to get through the day – YOU ARE HAPPY NOW.

7. Don’t waste any more time imagining the person you should be.

8. Don’t listen to the fears in your head – They are lying to you! All those bad things won’t happen.

9. Embrace your happiness today, not when you think you deserve it at some point in the future.

10. Stop thinking that there are any requirements to happiness other than the ones you’ve already got.